I am bothered again by the chestpains that i felt. I started feeling it yesterday. I guess it was prompted by yesterday's anger. The day before it was sadness over a casual remark by somebody. I never did like being the target of a green joke. It's harrassment. But of course, I can't say anything about it. I have mouths to feed. Yup, welcome to the real world. I have also been unmindful of what i eat. I have been eating pizza for the last few days courtesy of officemates' gain on the stockmarket. And i gained weight, and getting to lazy to exercise.
No matter, it's actually an improvement of sort. Back home, it's like a weekly occurence. Sometimes, i think it is triggered by anxiety. I am always conscious of my heartrate, the need to exercise, and being too picky with what i eat. Since living here in the big city, i don't put too much stock on everything anymore. I figured, if your life stops there, there's probably nothing much that anyone can do. And so , i have more peaceful thoughts. I am also pre-occupied with other things and so i have less time thinking about my situations.
I guess, i need another vacation now. In truth, I will be going back home. Visiting my family, attending a wedding, so i will just concentrate in having fun. Yup, i need to concentrate to have fun. That's how mental my problem is. I can't help but think about it in my alone time. But i have so much to be thankful for. And everytime, i'm just so down, i think of them(my kids) and everything just keeps getting brighter. Did i mention, praying helps?