Tread softly

He Wishes for the cloths of Heaven
by William Butler Yeats.

Had i the heavens' embroidered cloths'
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But i, being poor, have only dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because your treading on my dreams.

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My dreams are not grandiose and it's all about family.
I wish and fervently hope and pray for a happy and successful family life united always in love. But i am only half of a whole and i am telling you my dreams and laying it at your feet...so tread softly because your treading on my dreams

Don't love you no more

Yesterday, a friend of hubby told me that she doesn't mind if her husband goes home late at night or if he doesn't go home. She doesn't ask any questions even if her husband do something out of his daily routine. So i asked her if it's okay with her that her husband just come and goes without telling her, just like a doormat? And she said yes. It's because she doesn't really give 100% of herself to him, she withholds a bit for herself an insurance because you don't really know what's going to happen in the future. Less pain that way.

How is it possible to love someone and not give 100% of yourself? Maybe by slowly telling yourself that you no longer love the person?

Maybe it is possible to shift the focus. Instead of loving him a 100%, love your children 125%, the other 25% you keep to yourself living him only 50%. Does it make sense?

I won't care who moved my cheese...

I wonder if there ever is a person whose got no problem. Even the rich, the famous, and the beautiful have problems known only to them. No one person has it easy, some just know how to carry their problems well. A positive outlook certainly helps a lot.

Lately, i have been feeling a bit overwhelm by my own concerns. I wanted somebody to change, to conform to the way i expected him to be. Deep inside, i know that real change can not be forced. But still i persisted, i used reason and morals and promises given long ago. Now i know, that the only person i can really change is me. If i continue to look at things, and person and circumstances as the culprit there will be no real progress. I can only lead the horse to the water, i cannot make it drink. And so i will focus on me, changing those things and perception and attitudes that needed changing to make me a better and healthier and more effective me.

Hopefully, and with a lot of prayers, these same realizations will also come to him and change him.

Joy

This was taken about 2 years ago, i think. Sometimes you miss those times when you still could cuddle them and not feel their weight. That's why every parent should not miss these growing up years. By the way, i am infanticipating. he he he. Is that a word?

Before the worst

Before The Worst lyrics
Songwriters: O Donoghue, Daniel John; Power, Glen Joseph; Sheehan, Mark Anthony;

It's been a while since the two of us talked
About a week since the day that you walked
Knowing things would never be the same
With your empty heart and mine full of pain

So explain to me how it came to this
Take it back to the night we kissed
It was Dublin city on a Friday night
With vodkas and coke, I was getting insomniac

We were sitting with our backs against the world
Saying things that we thought but never heard
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this

But everything we talked about is gone
And the only chance we have of moving on
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met
Before our hearts decided it?s time to love again
Before too late, before too long
Let?s try and take it back before it all went wrong

There was a time that we?d stay up all night
Best friends, yeah talking 'til the daylight
Took the joys alongside the pain
With not much to lose but so much to gain

Are you hearing me? 'Cause I don?t wanna miss
That you would drift on memory bliss
It was Grafton street on a rainy night
I was down on one knee and you were mine for life

We were thinking we would never be apart
With your name tattooed across my heart
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this

But everything we talked about is gone
And the only chance we have of moving on
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met
Before our hearts decided it?s time to love again
Before too late, before too long
Let?s try and take it back before it all went wrong

If the clouds don't clear
Then we'll rise above it, we'll rise above it
Heavens gate is so near, come walk with me through
Just like we used to, just like we used to, yeah, yeah

Let's take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met
Before our hearts decide it's time to love again
Before too late, before too long
Let's try to take it back before it all went wrong
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

About me...

I try very hard to be a wife.
I am not sure i am succeeding.
I am also a mother.
I am confident of my children's love.
I always favor right vs. wrong.
I strongly value integrity, honesty and hardwork.

I believe in God Almighty and the Divine Plan and that there are many roads that leads to Him.

I am one of those who cling on to the idea that love and commitment and fidelity goes hand in hand.

I am strong most of the time but i find that my strength gets sapped when i am attacked not by friends and colleagues but by my better half.

I used to be such a romantic. That side of me surfaces not so often now that i am older.

And oh, i pray often. I have few chosen friends mostly family. And I get by with a little help from my friends...and a lot of prayers

my 1St attempt at lumpia shanghai.started at 1Am finished at 2am.